So Long Have I Waited
by LiarEpicteller
Summary: [CA] everything can change in 15 years edited
1. 1the first broken expectations

**Disclaimer:** Not mine... LOL ;)

**A/N:** Please R&R! thx

* * *

**SO LONG HAVE I WAITED**

**a story by anihanca**

**Part – 1 "The First Broken Expectations"**

**_"Love lives on hope, and dies when hope is dead." Pierre Corneille_**

_Year 1986…_

_It was early autumn and the sun was shining down. Claire McLeod, age 14, was leaning on the wall, daydreaming. It was the first day of the school term and in a few minutes she will be in a classroom, getting bored. Claire sighed loudly, then glanced back in the room at her new Italian room-mate Lucia, hoping she didnt wake her up. Luckily she was a heavy sleeper and didnt even budge. Claire slowly grabbed her books from the shelf and walked out of the room._

_The previous night, when she just arrived the school, after unpacking her bags, she had stared out the window, wishing she wasnt too coward to talk to him, to tell him what she felt. 'him'… Alex Ryan, her best mate ever. But for about a year she had felt some strange things in her stomach everytime she saw him. And everytime he came and talked to her, she had been red from head to toe and stuttered, not knowing what to say. And everytime it just turned into an embarrasment... She was crazy afraid of losing her best mate because of this, and so she kept quite. But now, this morning, walking along the dark corridors, she was absolutely adamant to face her fear and tell him no matter what. Enough was enough.._

_She stepped out of the building which the girls were staying in and through the big school garden. The temperature was just perfect, the birds were singing. It felt like a spring day. Everything felt just right. It was the greatest day to be outside. She could have spent the entire day out. She kept walking passing the large, scary school building by, making her way to the boys' dormitory. _

_There he was, standing on the top step, staring right at her. His blue eyes were shining brilliantly in the ray of light. _

"_Morning, Claire!" he called with his gorgeous smile, making Claire much more nervous than she was a second ago. _

"_Morning.." was all she could say. She was so concentrated on what she was going to tell him, and didnt realise that he was about to say something too. _

"_Listen Claire…"_

"_Alex!"…There was a pause and some embarrased laughter. _

"_You go first!"_

"_Ladies first" they spoke at the same time again neither hearing what the other said. Claire looked at him and nodded, letting him know that she would let him talk._

"_Okay look," Alex started, "well I heard that your… your…" he looked down at the ground, playing with some pebbles with his feet._

"_Yes.. my?" Claire tried to encourage him to talk._

"_I just wondered if.. if you could introduce me to your room-mate, Claire?" he said finally, little embarrased._

"_Lucia?" she asked, her eyes wide open. She felt the whole universe explode within her body._

"_Yes.. She's an Italian, right? What a pretty name.. LUCIA…" He seemed lost in reverie for a moment with a stupid grin on his face, then looked up; "Please do this for me Claire, will you?"_

"_Yeah.. yeah sure.." Claire replied, with a lump on her throat, then turned her head and thought to herself; "Only in your dreams McLeod..."_

Present day…

"Where are you going, Al?" Nick yelled behind Alex who was about to walk out of the house.

"Heading to town" he replied, taking his coat and hat from the rack.

"Do you have a date?"

"No, nothing like that!" He was in a hurry and nervous. Suddenly Nick realised why Alex was going to town at that time of the night.

"Oh come on Alex! What do you think you can do about it! That's crazy.. Just leave her alone!" Nick demanded, laughing.

"No Nick. You cant understand. She doesnt know him. It's too dangerous to go out with strangers!" Alex explained.

"That's stupid Alex.. I think you are jealous, and thats it!" now Nick was laughing harder and twitching against his stomach.

"Yeah yeah, go on, laugh and have your fun.. and think whatever you want to think, alright! I'm just trying to protect her!"

"Sure.. So what will you do? Follow them?"

"Yeah, why not.." Alex smiled.

"Man, she'll kill you!"

"Only if she sees me!"

With that Alex turned around and headed to the door, got out of the house, walked hurriedly to his car and took the route to town…


	2. 2following the fact

**Part – 2 "Following The Fact"**

**_"You call it madness, but I call it LOVE!" Don Byas_**

He drove to the night club and parked next to a car -with a man sitting in it, his eyes closed and hands behind his head, appearently sleeping; and set to wait. It had been two hours when he saw the black Volvo pull up in front of the club. A well-dressed man got out, racing to the other side, he opened the door and helped her out of the car. She was wearing a long black dress, a shiny one, with thin straps so he could see almost all of her shoulders where her shimmering dark hair didnt cover completely, and looking gorgeous. He felt like he needed a beer. She gently smiled at him; "thank you" she mouthed. Then they slowly walked in the club.

Alex was left outside again. He couldnt go after them, he couldnt find enough courage to do it. "what if Claire sees me?".. he decided to stay at the point where he was now, and wait until they come out.

"You are jealous, and thats it!" Nick's voice echoed in his mind. "I'm not! I'm not! Why would I be jealous! I just dont want something bad happening to her!" he denied aloud. Then thanked to god that no one was around to see him talking to himslef, except from that man who was still sleeping in his car. "It must be comfy" Alex thought, "and I have nothing else to do".. He laid his seat back, put his hat over his face and crossed his arms over his chest. In a minute he was snorring really loud and like gasping for air...

…………………………..

He opened his eyes to the roar of the engine and could slightly see the black car turning the far corner of the street and through the darkness. Three and a half hours had passed since he had fallen asleep in the car.

"Damn!" he said to himself as he immediately started the engine, and at full throttle he pulled away leaving a dust cloud behind.

Now it was 2 oclock in the morning, he was still following the car along the dark road although it was out of sight. "For gods sake, what am I doing?" he thought to himself again. He was fed up with this endless game anymore, "This is so childish!" he cried, feeling so stupid for a second. And it was way too late to hit the brakes when he recognized two flashing red car lights in front of him. So he ended up slamming into the back of the black Volvo. He wasnt hurt so badly, but he was crazy worried for Claire and the other man, _ok, just for Claire!_ He couldnt believe it when he saw an unfamiliar woman getting out from the drivers side angrily and walking towards him, yelling:

"What the hell are you doing?"

He slid down the glass and tried to talk to her:

"I'm sorry mam, are you hurt?"

"No, I'm just fine" she answered, calming down. "But my car isnt so fine!"

"I know, I'm sorry.. I'll take care of it" he said. He didnt want any more trouble. He was so tired, and couldnt believe that he had followed the wrong car all that way.

Suddenly the woman's eyes lighten up, "ALEX RYAN!" she screamed in disbelief.

"Yeah, that would be me" he replied, with questioning eyes, smiling.

"It's me!" she screamed again, expecting him to recognize her, "Lucia Alessi"

"Oh my god, Lucia!" Alex gasped, opening his car door to get out and greet her.

…………………

About thirty minutes later they were sipping their coffees at an open coffee shop, talking.

"I cant believe that you and Claire are still friends, Alex" she smiled, "I thought you have already get married, and have lots of kids!"

"Get out of here!" he grumbled.

"No, I'm serious!" she continued, "It was so obvious that you two were made for eachother"

"Actually you're wrong, Lucia" Alex said, "She was never interested in me, I mean in that way. But we are good friends!"

"So why on earth were you following her in the middle of the night, Alex?" she asked matter-of-factly, looking at him in the eye.

"Because she didnt know him!" he answered, getting angry.

"Was that the only reason?"

"Yes, of course.." He put the mug back on the table and turned his eyes on her again, "I just didnt want anything bad to happen to her. I was just worried, because…" he stopped, his eyes wide open, staring at Lucia in disbelief.

"Go on, Alex.. Because?" she said, giving a supportative squeeze on his upper arm.

"Oh my god!" He covered his mouth with one shaky hand, "Because I love her!"


	3. 3swallowing it back

**Part – 3 "Swallowing It Back"**

**_"Love is the most difficult and dangerous form of courage. Courage is the most desperate, admirable and noble kind of love." Delmore Schwartz_**

It was a lovely morning. White fleecy clouds floated in a clear blue sky and the  
sun was shining. It was one of those days which make the early autumn one of the most pleasant seasons of the year. Alex had made up his mind to rush over to Drovers and confess his love for Claire. Exhausted after the long, terrible night, he got off his car, and slowly walked along the drive, into the house through the kitchen enterance. His eyes were puffy and he carried his hat in his hand. He was so nervous, but so sure that he was ready. Not expecting anyone around, he wandered to the empty kitchen, grabbed a soda and some cheese from the fridge and sat to wait for someone to come.

It had been a couple of minutes when he heard some footsteps coming down the stairs. Walking to the staircase to see who it was, he came across a man with grey eyes and raven hair. And right then he realized that unfortunately he hadnt recognized the black volvo outside.

"Hi" the man spoke, "Do you live here too? Man, this house is crowded!"

"No no, I dont live here" Alex answered in a distant voice and waited as if savoring the moment.

"Dean Stephen" he introduced himself and reached out for a handshake.

"Alex Ryan" he said, putting out his hand.

"Oh, Alex Ryan! Claire's partner, nice to meet you" Dean replied in excitement.

"Yeah, you too" Alex said forcing a fake smile, _"pure pleasure"_

Dean took a few steps and sat down at the kitchen table. Then he turned around and looked at Alex and grinned annoyingly. At that moment Alex decided that he didn't like him. In fact, he hated him. He was really unfriendly and condescending.

"But isnt it quite early to come here and talk to your business partner, Alex?" he asked insolently.

Alex was trying to control his anger which was about to burst out like a hungry herd of cattle when the fence is open.

"Well.. actually" he spoke irascibly, "it's quite late to come down to the kitchen for breakfast in underwear!" then he left the house frustrated.

His heart was broken along with his hopes, dreams, and expectations about the future. _How could she do that? He is just a jerk! She deserves so much better that this. By better you mean you, dont you Ryan? Yeah? Only in your dreams... _

"Who were you talking to?" Claire asked Dean, walking in the kitchen with a sleepy face, gave him a quick kiss and grinned.

"I wasnt talking to anyone" he replied, lifting her up and giving her a swing in the air. "Come on" he said, "show me around!"

The couple walked out of the house happily, hand in hand. (A/N: yuck:P)

Alex was devastated, hurt, betrayed, angry and extremely exhausted when he arrived at Wilgul. He slowly walked into the homstead through the front rooms back into the kitchen area. He grabbed a beer and slammed the fridge closed. Then he walked back to the veranda and sat down in one of the chairs next to the small table. Nick was probably working at somewhere so Alex was left alone so he could think all day long. But some time later, he felt sleepy. His eyes drifted shut and he felt the heavy blanket of sleep seep into his soul, and finally he fell asleep. In his dream he was on a mountain of ice, lost and freezing. He was alone, terribly and frighteningly alone. He found himself walking among some strange rocks, unable to find his way. Then he heard someone calling our for him: "Alex!" He looked around but couldnt see anybody.

"Alex! Alex wake up!" Claire spoke, gently shaking him.

"I am asleep" he murmured tiredly, slightly opening his eyes enough to gaze at her.

"Up on your feet, Ryan, right now! We have tons of things to do!" she shouted, her hands on her hips.

"Claire, I am tired alright!" he complained, rising.

"You are tired! Well, I am tired too, but I'm not whining around!"

"Why are you tired Claire?" he asked sarcastically, dying to hear the details, "Didnt you sleep last night?"

"No I didnt" she replied, still angry.

"Why?"

"Mind your own business Alex, now come on, we have horses to train, remember? I came to take Thunder back to Drovers!" she shot back and made her way to the stables.

Alex watched her walking away.. It was ironic that he felt like he was losing her, and that she was like going far far away from him, and with a know-it-all jerk !


	4. 4hidden feelings

**Part – 4 "Hidden Feelings"**

**_"All love that has not friendship for its base, is like a mansion built upon sand." Ella Wheeler Wilcox_**

"Alex, I need to tell you something" she said untieing the reins and began to unknot them, not daring to lift her head up and look at him, trying to pretend like it was just a normal event. But inside, she was aware of how important it would be. According to Alex, he was her best mate forever, but for many years Claire has felt something more for him. And now it was hard to inform him about her new boyfriend. It was kind of heatbreaking, to know he has never felt the same. And all those years she couldnt get herself from imagining the possibilities.

_She walked down the hall, through the ball room, butterflys in her stomach, feeling her heart race with trepidation. Just a minute ago, when she was staring through the mirror, she had thought she seemed weird in that dress, weird but pretty, maybe a little beautiful. The prom had already started, and Alex must have been in there, doing god knows what. He hadnt been with someone for a week or so, then maybe he would like to dance with Claire. She felt like she was about to die from a heart attack. But she knew she had to enter that room and show him that she could be pretty just like the other girls were. Her hair slowly tumbing back down around her shoulders, finally she cleared her throat and walked in. Just when she took the first step, she froze looking at the handsome boy who was crazy dancing with Isabel Carter in the center of the dancefloor, all eyes on him. It was that moment when she realized her blue dress was not as elegant as the blue dress Isabel wore. Claire slowly backed away and silently left the ball room to get changed back to her jeans. _

"I'm all ears" he said, crossing his arms across his chest.

"Well I know it's not very important for you, and you never tell me about this kind of stuff of yours, because I always find out myself... and actually it wouldnt arouse your interest maybe. But I need you to know.."

"Claire!" he interrupted, "Just tell me!"

"Okay, Alex. I'm with someone" she finally said, "His name is Dean Stephen, I met him two days ago and he's very nice. He'd like to meet you, you know, you're my partner"

"Alright" was all he said as a response. He was way too busy of thinking why Dean didnt tell Claire he had already met Alex that morning.

"Alright!" she confirmed bewildered, trying to find some place to put her hands. Finally she decided to place them on her hips. She expected a different response from him, maybe some more words like _i'm happy for you _or something.

"Yeah" he replied. He didnt know what else to say. He cared about her so much, more than she could imagine, and more than anyone could. He didnt want any little thing to hurt her. He was worried, but there was nothing to do.

"I better get going" Claire said holding the reins tightly as she walked, looking back over her shoulder, "Drop in sometime today!"

"I will" Alex answered turnig around and making his way to the homestead. _"If only you knew how I really feel about you Claire..."_

_Alex Ryan proudly stepped into the classroom, raised his arms like a spoiled child expecting his classmates to flatter him because of the medal he had won at the rodeo. The only one who didnt pay attention to him was Ellen Wilden, his recent girlfriend. Taking courage from Claire not being around, Alex walked to her and sit down at the desk next to Ellen._

"_Look, I'm sorry alright?" he said, trying to sound really sorry._

"_Dont talk to me Alex!" she shot back, her head turned to the other side._

"_I didnt mean it Ellen, but I had to"_

"_You left me Alex, and without making any reasonable excuse!" Ellen turned her eyes to him, and let him see her tears. _

"_Well I'm sorry but I had nothing else to do. Please understand Ellen!" he was trying to keep his voice down, that the rest couldnt hear they were argueing. _

"_I dont understand Alex. Why did you want me to be your girlfriend when you loved someone else?"_

"_Because! Ellen, this is not going anywhere, I'm sorry for all I've done alright!" Alex said, and furiously left the classroom, thinking:_

"_Because I'm a chicken. I cant tell her how I feel. I'm scared like a little girl... If only I could tell you Claire, if only you knew how I really feel about you..."_


	5. 5return of the hero

**Part – 5 "Return Of The Hero"**

**_"Every parting is a form of death, as every reunion is a type of heaven." Tyron Edwards_**

year 2016...

"You will like the horses, i know you will" Alex said smiling to his 13-year-old son Shane who didnt seem like enjoying the drive. His deep green eyes looked away from the book "Demon Empire volume:4" and gazed emptily out of the window.

"I used to live there before. I will teach you how to ride and everything" Alex tried to start a conversation once more but just like the other twentyfour shots he had given during the 9-hour-drive it didnt work either.

Shane was sad, and Alex was trying to understand him. He had lost his mother just a week ago. His mother, Kimberly... The woman who Alex had spent the last 14 years together. When she tragically died in a car accident, Alex had decided to take Shane to his hometown in the hope of the chance that he would feel better in the nature. Shane was a fragile child, not like his father used to be when he was at Shane's age. He didnt have so much friends, actually he didnt have any friends in Sydney, where they used to live in last 15 years. But actually that was the problem. His mother was his only friend, and she was the only one who could reach Shane. Most of the time he didnt even let Alex, his own father to talk to him. And now they were left behind a great sorrow of losing one of the important parts of their lives.

Returning to Gungellan wasnt easy for Alex either. 15 years ago, when he left the town, he didnt tell anybody where he was going. Because he didnt know where he was going either. One day, after seing how happy Claire was with Dean Stephen, he just decided to take off and since then he neither came back nor informed anyone about where he was. 15 years... Now he didnt know what he would do if he came across someone he knew. But this time, for his son he would bear it, and he would stay in Gungellan no matter what.

Finally the car pulled off in front of the Gungellan Hotel. It didnt seem changed apart from the rusty window borders and doors. Alex rapidly got out and set to remove the bags from the trunk. Shane was still inside, staring at the pretty girl who was sitting in the next car.

"Come on buddy, get your behind out of the car or i will have to use a bloody winch!" Alex called from under a hill of bags.

"Alright!" Shane grumbled, putting the book back in his back pack.

The girl giggled to the conversation the boy and his father had.

"Hey, what's your name?" she asked, leaning out from the window.

"I'm Shane" he answered shyly.

Alex was excitedly watching his son's first attempts for a friendship behind the open trunk door, smiling.

"And I'm Amy Ryan" she said proudly, reaching her hand out.

By the second Alex heard the name of the girl, he urgently closed the trunk door and raced to the side of the car where Shane was standing. He looked at the girl who was a certain mixture of two people he once knew. Long blonde hair with pretty curls... big blue eyes... A huge shiny smile and a strong chin. She was the daughter of Nick and Tess, there was no doubt..

As Alex was staring at her with a strong shock expression on his face, she continued asking as if she would never stop.

"Are you here to visit someone?"

_yea, daughter of Tess_, Alex thought when his son finally broke his ice and answered:

"No, we're here to stay"

"Oh great!" she screamed, "so we'll be going to the same school. Then maybe your father would buy our property, and we'd become neighbours!"

"Wha.. wait a minute, what property?" Alex asked, shaking his head.

"Dad's selling one of our properties, Kilarney. It's great. You should see there!"

"Noone lives there?" it was Alex's turn to be curious now.

"No.." she smiled, "since my grandparents died, it's useless."

The words echoed in his mind, _since her grandparents died..._ it felt like the whole world was spinning. "oh my god.." he whispered in disbelief.

"Ah, dont be sorry for me" Amy spoke again, "I didnt love them anyway. Well if you are interested in the property, dad will be here in a minute. You can talk to him. Actually the real estate agent Tom Kingley is taking care of it, but maybe you would like to meet my father. And if you like, you can..."

Amy continued speaking but Alex couldnt hear the words coming after _"...dad will be here in a minute..." _He panicked and ran to the back side of the car to take the bags again straight to the hotel. Then he came back near the kids, grabbed Shane from his arm and said goodbye to Amy, locked the car and went into the hotel.. In a few seconds it was like he never had been there, he simply disapeared because of the fear seing his brother.

Amy was confused. She looked behind them and called:

"It was nice to meet you too..."


	6. 6getting there

**Part – 6 "Getting There"**

**_"I sit beside my lonely fire and pray for wisdom yet; for calmness to remember or courage to forget." Charles Hamilton Aide_**

Next morning, in a very early hour Alex slowly got up from the bed and walked over to the window, trying to be quiet. He stared out the window and watched the light shining over the trees. The town didnt seem the same as 15 years ago. Most of the buildings and shops had become old and some new had been built. There were so many unfamiliar people walking around. And appearantly, good old Brian wasnt working at the hotel anymore. Alex considered himself lucky that there hadnt been anybody to recognise him yet.

Some time later, after settling up with memories, he approached Shane's bed, kneeled down and ran his hand into his son's fair hair.

"Time to wake up, kiddo!" he whispered.

"What time is it?" Shane asked sleepily, rubbing at his eyes.

"It's almost seven.."

"Seven?" he complained, "what the hell am i meant to do at seven oclock!"

"Get up son, there is somewhere i want to take you.. "

Twenty minutes later they were standing at the gate of an imposing property, looking around with total amazement. Shane was amazed because it was the biggest garden he had ever seen and it was just like a fairytale. "Heaven must be like this" he thought to himslef, "mum must be somewhere like this..."

And Alex was amazed because after 15 years he was looking at his home, and everything was how he remembered, how he had left it...

"Kilarney!" Shane yelled, reading the sign at the gate, "This is the property Amy mentioned yesterday!"

"This is our house!" Alex replied, smiling, causing Shane to be bewildered.

"Are we going to buy this house?"

"We dont need to!" with that Alex walked straight to the house, followed by a very curious teenager who was now totally confused and dying for an explanation.

Shane knew nothing about Alex's past life. He had never been interested. But now chasing his father in a huge garden of this weird house, he thought he needed some answers.

"Come, look at this pool. What do you think?" Alex asked excited.

"Alright!" Shane replied.

"Do you want to see inside the house first, or I can show you the stables?"

"Dad, stop!" he called behind Alex who already made his way to the stables, "Whose is this house?"

"I told you Shane, it's ours!"

"How come? Dad, I dont understand anything!"

At just the moment Alex changed his way and moved close to his son to tell him they needed to talk, they heard a crackling from the back side.

"Who's there?" Alex called.

"Oh yeah, Tom Kingley, real estate agent. Yeah, are you interested in the house?" came the answer.

"Well, YEAH... Maybe we could talk for a minute if you show your face! Yeah?" Alex said looking around, searchin for him.

Finally the man showed up from behind a couple of bushes and smiled;

"Yeah! Hi!"

"Hi.." Alex replied trying very hard not to laugh. By the way Shane had already burst into laughter.

"So you are taking care of this house?" Alex asked.

"Yeah yeah.. Mr Ryan is very busy so yeah.."

"Yeah yeah, I understand.."

"Well this is the best house you can find around, and has four bedrooms, a study, two large living rooms and a huge kitchen. You must have seen the pool already. We can go and check out the stables if you like! Are you a farmer Mr.. Mr..?"

Searching quickly in his mind for a suitable name, Alex just told the one he came up with first.

"Harvey... Ray Harvey. And my son, Shane!" He opened his eyes wide in relief and let out a big heavy sigh.

"Are you a farmer?" Tom asked, not satisfied.

"Oh yeah, I used to be, once.." Alex replied, finally putting his hands in his pockets.

"Okay.. And there are seven big paddocks you can definately put to good use, and so many advantages more. This is the best house for you and your family Mr. Harvey!" Tom finished his speech with proud and stared at Alex with a stupid expression on his face, waiting for him to ask something more. Meanwhile Shane was totally speechless, trying to figure out what was going on.

"How about the neighbours?" Alex asked, feeling himself much more ready to hear some news.

"Oh well.. Let me think.. There is Wilgul on the east side. Nick Ryan, the landlord and his wife and children.. On the west there is Sandra and Vince Lavise's property. It's really huge because they confederated their properties after getting married years ago. And on the north side you've got Drovers Run. Claire McLeod and her children."

_Claire McLeod and her children... McLeod... Children..._

"Doesnt she have a husband?" Alex asked, not sure whether he wanted to know or not..

"Oh no.. He left a couple of years ago" Tom replied, not much interested, "Anyway I got to go now. You can stay and look around. Here is my card, call me and tell me when you want to make the contract. Ok?"

"Alright, thank you very much Tom.." Alex called, watching him leaving.

He stayed there for a few minutes more, staring into the air.. Nick and Tess had a family.. So did Claire and so did himself.. Even that bloody Sandra got married with Vince Lavise.. Everything had changed. Now he wasnt sure if he should show himself. What if he ruined their lives one more time? What if they didnt want to see him after all those years? What if they told him to bugger off, and that he didnt have the right to come back? Everything had changed... And for the first time in his life, he was really scared.

"Dad!"

Shane's voice woke him up from his reverie.

"What?"

"What's going on, dad? Tell me what is it all about?"

"This is all about me, son.. all about my past!" he replied, still staring into the distance.

"What are you gonna do now?"

"I dont know what to do Shane.. Maybe you could give me some advice..?"

"Yeah, sure" Shane replied, "But first you must tell me the story!"

"I will" Alex looked at his son, "Lets find somewhere to sit and talk.."

"Alright..."

He put his hand on Shane's shoulder and guided him out of the garden to the car. They got in the car in silence and took off...


	7. 7born to crisis

**Part – 7 "Born To Crisis"**

**_"Don't walk behind me, I may not lead. Don't walk in front of me, I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend." Albert Camus_**

"_It was a bad idea_" Alex thought to himself as he turned his looks away from his disappointed son who was gazing at him with teary eyes, "_Why on earth you told him the entire story, Ryan? You could have passed 'the Claire part'... at least..."_

"So you havent ever loved mum?" came the question, his voice was low and pleading. They had been sitting in front of the hotel.

"Gee, Shane! How could you think that? I loved her! Loved her, and still do.. But you must understand, this is different!"

"Whatever..." Shane grumbled, "Even if this caused me to be born, you still had left people you loved and who loved you, right? That means you can leave me too!" He put on his headphones back as he returned to his book.

Shane was right. He had left them.. For a single terrible minute Alex wondered how it would feel if someone else, for example Nick or Claire, was missing on a day like that. Out there somewhere... and he not knowing... The prospect was so awful, so breathtaking, so mind-shattering that he rejected it. _"What have I done! They must hate me... Hate me..."_

All of a sudden he rose from the chair that he had been sitting for a long time and made his way to the hotel room to pack their bags.

"Come on Shane, we're going back to Sydney.." he informed his son. _"It was a bad idea anyway..." _He repeated.

Shane obeyed, closed his book and followed his father to the room, with a hidden relief inside, _"We're going back..."_

Twenty-five minutes later they were in the car, heading to Sydney as Shane suddenly screamed, "STOP! Dad, pull over!"

"What now?" Alex complained, squeezing his eyes and tossing his head from side to side.

"My book, I left my book at the hotel! Please dad, we have to go back!"

"Shane, I'll buy you one, okay! The same one, when we go to Sydney!"

"NO! I want MY book!" he replied insistently.

"Shane!" Alex warned him that he was about to shout, his eyes wide open.

"It was a present from mum! Please!"

"Alright, alrgiht!" Alex mumbled, finally giving in. He turned the car round and drove back to Gungellan.

As Alex parked the car in front of the hotel, Shane ran. Alex decided to wait him there. He placed his elbow on the window border, staring out. Then he noticed three figures fighting at the back side of the pub. Two older boys were beating a younger one really bad. Alex got off immediately and ran towards the boys, calling "Hey! Hey, stop it!"

He hold one of the older boys' arm just before he hit the younger one. "Stop it!" he said one more time, "Leave him alone!"

"Mind your own bizzo!" came the answer from the other one.

"You've just found the very man, kiddo" Alex replied, he was completely seeing red.

He pushed the other one, the boy fell down. Then he grabbed the younger one's arm and helped him up. The younger boy was not able to walk by himself so Alex took his arm and walked him to the car.

"It's not over, Stephen!" one of the older boys called after him, "We'll kill you next time!"

Alex's blood rushed into his head as he heard the boy's name.

"Is your name Stephen?" he asked.

"Yeah" he answered, his voice rose in a shriek as he grabbed his ribs, "Justin Stephen"

"We should take you home" Alex said, looking at his shiny blue eyes which were covered with blood, aware of who he exactly was.

As Shane came back to the car he found his father pressing a dirty clothe to Justin's bloody forehead.

"Leave me alone!" Justin cried out.

"Dad?" Shane said, with questioning eyes.

"Shane, meet Justin. Justin, this is my son Shane!" Alex introduced the boys to eachother.

"I dont care! I dont wanna know you and your stupid son" Justin groaned, "Why on earth you want to take me home, man?"

"Alex, my name is Alex" Alex replied, pretending not to have heart what Justin said, and just after saying that he realized what he did, "Erm, I mean Alex is my middle name, I am Ray!"

Justin nodded, not paying so much attention.

"Backseat, Shane!" Alex ordered to his son, then he closed Justin's door and got in the car. Making his way to Drovers, he was thinking what he was going to do.

"_Her son..."_ Alex though to himself, as the boys were sitting in a deep silence. It was a strange feeling and he didnt know what to do yet.

Justin was looking down, one hand on his forehead and the other on his chest, with a sharp painful expression on his face. Appearantly he was a strong boy. He must have been thirteen or maybe fourteen. But looking at his meaningful face, you could say he was over twenty. It was obvious that he had experienced so much. He had a personality.

"My aunt has a son called Alex" Justin spoke, just for the sake of conversation. He finally came to his senses and accepted that man was trying to help him.

Alex turned his head in a real slowmotion to look at him with a frozen, scary expression on his face, eyes and also mouth wide open. Justin and even Shane felt it and it made them shiver, they gasped.

"Alex?" he repeated..

"Yes.." Justin replied, "is it bad?" he also asked. He didnt understand what was wrong with that name.

"No, no!" Alex answered, rapidly spinning his head and shotting Shane a short glance, then moved his eyes to Justin again, and he smiled – a real smile that miraculously eased the tension, "Not really..."

Thus, Alex realized that he was loved and missed, that he should have stayed. He should have go and tell them he was alive. _"But how?"_ he asked himself loud.

"How what?" Shane asked, trying to figure out what was happening.

"Nothing" Alex smiled. Then turned to Justin, "What was the fight about?"

"Nah.. Nothing. They just know how to annoy me!" he replied.

"How do they annoy you?" Alex asked this time.

"Long story.." Justin said, "But my advice to you, dont ever leave your son, alright?"

"Is it about your father?" Shane wondered, reaching his head between the seats.

"Here, that's where I live" Justin changed the subject, pointing out the old stone house that had appeared from behind the hill. "But how did you know where I live?"

"Aaah..." Alex was searching for an answer, "I didnt" he said finally, "I just drove, you know".. Then he looked at Justin to see wether he believed it or not..

The car pulled up in front of the big old building. Alex stared around with all the memories coming back. Justing reached his hand to the door handle. Before pulling it, he looked at Alex and mouthed "thank you"..

Alex was planning to leave without being seen by anyone by the time Justin got out of the car. But seeing that he couldnt walk on his own, Alex understood that he had to help Justin to the house. He got off and put Justin's hand on his own shoulder and started to walk with him. As they reached to the door a furious woman quickly opened the door, getting ready to shout at Justin, "DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS!" Then she noticed, "Oh my god, Justin! What happened!"

She took his arm and helped him inside.

Alex could have run away by that time, as they were inside. But he couldnt. He was nailed to the point he was standing.

"Claire!" he murmured in a total amazement and shock. She didnt noticed who had brought her son home at the heat of the moment. "Claire?" he whispered again. She wore dark brown pants and a light blue shirt. Her hair was longer and tied up in a ponytail. There were fine lines around those blue eyes, but you'd still never take her for forty-four.

A few minutes later, her voice was heard again.

"Sorry I forgot to thank you..." she talked to him as she was walking along the corridor towards the door.

"He is so irritable. I dont know what to..." she stopped as she saw who was standing in front of the door. Grabbing the door with one hand, afraid of fainting, she leaned against the door frame, "... do with him!" she finished her sentence, lowering her shaky voice. Alex watched as the colour drained from her face. Their eyes were locked, they kept staring eachother emptily, in shock.

"I.. ah.. I must go" Alex stuttered, taking a few steps back.

Claire just nodded, fighting back the tears.

He slowly walked to the car, got in, backed up and drove onto the narrow dirt lane that wound through an acre of woods until it terminated on the road that led to Gungellan.


	8. 8think before you act

**Part 8 – "Think Before You Act"**

**_"It's very easy to forgive others, their mistakes; it takes more grit and gumption to forgive them for having witnessed your own." Jessamyn West_**

The silence in the old dining room was deathly and you could see the nervousness and the tension on the faces as the clock ticked closer to the midnight. No sound, just an eerie stillness... It was unbearable. Finally Nick slammed his fist to the table making everything, everywhere shake. Little Alex began to cry.

"Amy, take your brother to Carrie's room, okay?" Tess smiled nervously to her daughter.

"Okay" little girl nodded slightly, her momentary scared expression turned back into disbelief. She refused to think that her parents have never told her about her uncle, and also she refused to think that she had already met him and his son.

"Amy, today!" Nick shouted at last, waking the little girl up from her reverie.

"Nick stop it!" Tess shot back, looking at her husband's furious eyes.

Amy slowly got up from the couch, took her baby brother and left the room, making her way to her cousin's room.

"Where's Justin?" Tess asked.

"In his room..." Claire replied, trying to hide how comfortable the conversation made her, "...hopefully calming down"

In the kitchen Becky Howard, the old and reliable housekeeper and stationhand of Drovers began pouring coffee into cups that she had already placed on a tray. Quickly she cut up a coffee cake that she had baked the day before, "Perhaps coffee will help everyone" she thought. But when she came back to the dining room, she only found Tess and Claire looking out from the window to the dark garden, worried.

"What happened?" Becky asked, with the tray in her hands.

"He took off to find Alex" Tess answered nervously, not turning her eyes from the window.

"Should we follow him?" Claire looked at her sister.

"I dont know... Maybe we should just wait here" Tess said, crossing her arms on her chest.

"Let them work this out between themselves" Becky spoke.

"Yeah..." Claire noded slightly, "you're right..."

* * *

On the other hand Nick was already in front of Gungellan Hotel. Overcoming an indecision moment, he got out from his car and walked in.

* * *

"Why did he just come back!" Claire cried, "I dont want him to turn everything upside down again!"

"Claire, who says everything will be upside down? Maybe he came for a visit!" Tess tried to relieve her sister.

"Oh yeah! And can you tell me who would he be visiting, Tess!" she finally exploded, "No, I dont want him in my life again! He should leave the town!"

* * *

"Get out of our lives, just like you did years ago!" Nick shouted.

"Stop it Nick, I'm sorry okay? But I'm back now. I'm here to stay!"

"You're not staying here. Whoever you are, it's for sure that you're not my brother anymore!"

"Nick!" Alex tried to reach his hand, but Nick just brushed it off.

"You weren't even here. You missed everything. My wedding... Births of my children, Claire's children... Death of our parents... Departure of Claire's husband... Where were you when we needed you? You know nothing about us anymore. You're an outsider!" Nick spoke, even if the words hurt to say.

"Yeah?" Alex panted, "But I still have the rights of Killarney!"

"You want Killarney?" Nick bewildered, "But you're not gonna get it. I'm selling it!"

"You cant sell it when I have the half of it!"

"Why do you think you have the half of it, Mr Ryan? Killarney is mine. You werent here, remember?" Nick smiled nervously.

"Nick!"

"No, I wont let you ruin my life one more time.." Nick said, stepping back "You're not belong here anymore, just leave us alone."

He began to walk away, but then stopped as he heard what Alex said,

"Then why did you name your son after me, Nick?"

"I named my son after a memorable part of my life. You're not a part of it anymore" he spoke not turning back to face him. Then he kept walking towards his ute leaving a furious and sad Alex and an upset Shane behind...


	9. That Damn Morning

Part 9 – "that damn morning" 

"Look, I dont get it!" Alex shouted through the receiver, "How could this happen? I mean that's my bank account... alright WAS my bank account! And how could someone take all my money, MY MONEY, without my permission!"

It was seven in the morning and he was talking on the phone for twenty minutes. Apparently someone had drawn all his money from his bank account. He was furious, crazy pacing back and forth in the room.

"So I'm broke now!... and you cant do anything! ...great! Thank you!"

He hung up the phone swearing under his breath, turned his head to stare at Shane, smiled nervously and spoke:

"I need to find a job immediately!"

Meanwhile at Killarney, Nick Ryan was preparing for a meeting with Vince Lavise, who had applied to buy the property for a high price. He was happy, he was sad.. He was confused and indecisive. Should he really sell the house? Was it a good decision to push Alex away? Was Vince a congruous choice for Killarney? Did he make a mistake by telling Alex all those things?

"No!" he talked to himself, "He left us! I cant pretend like none of this never ever happened!"

Things were not so good at Drovers either.

"What am I missing here!" Claire McLeod panicked throwing herself out of the stables, following the workmen. "You owe me an explanation!"

"Ma'am, we cant keep working for you. We've found a better job. We quit, sorry!" came the cold reply from one of the workers. Then they simply made their way away.

"Fine, just fine!" she smiled nervously, watching them go.

Becky was trying to calm Claire down.

"We'll find new workers, dont worry!" she said.

"You know we wont Becky!" Claire exploded, "No one wants to work for me, I dont know why but that's just the way it is. These men were the last one we could ever employ!"

"But there must be something we can do, or we'll lose the property!" Justin spoke.

"I wish there was..." Claire sighed, "I'll go talk to Nick."

"No, mum wait!" Justin demanded, "I'll go to town and try to find someone okay? Just wait till I get back.."

"Justin no!" she called behind him but he was way too gone already.

"This is nice.." Vince mouthed to himself looking around, studying every single detail in the large livingroom of Killarney.

"Dad used to repair the house every summer. It's well-kept and strong." Nick said walking behind him in the room.

"Seemingly it is." Vince replied, "Worth the fortune I will pay!"

"Yeah.." Nick smiled thoughtful.

Looking at the arrogant face of Vince Lavise reminded him how Alex hated that man. Thinking of the funny memories with Alex, Nick slightly smiled. And with a sudden decision he turned to face Vince.

"You know what Vince, I've changed my mind, I'm not selling it" he spoke.

"What?" Vince asked, smiling insolently, "You cannot find anyone to pay more!"

"I'm not selling, man!" Nick insisted, crossing his arms on his chest.

He wouldnt let Alex come and settle in there; but he wouldnt let the man who had won his brother's hate buy the property either. It wasnt right. Besides he couldnt stand seeing Sandra wander in the corridors of Killarney, _no!_

"You'll regret it.." Vince spoke furious, "Soon you'll be begging me to buy!"

"Have a nice day, Vince!" Nick smiled...

Alex was trying to figure out what he would do. _Should he go? Should he stay? _Everyting was getting to him. He need to get out of the hotel and breathe some fresh air. So he walked out. Looking around he saw Justin walking by, he seemed anxious.

"Hey Justin!" he called, walking to him.

"Hey you!" he replied back and kept walking. He didnt know if he should be talking to that man who didnt have a good impression on his family.

"Justin wait!" Alex called again, "What's wrong? Is everything okay?"

"Yeah yeah!" he evaded, "How about you?"

"Not good actually.." Alex tried to smile, "I'm officially broke! I need a job.."

All of a sudden Justin's face lit up. He had spent the whole day seeking for someone to work for Drovers and yet he couldnt find anyone. Now the man he had been looking for was standing in front of him. _Was it a good idea?_ His mum would probably kill him but still it was worth to try.

"What!" Alex asked when he noticed the expression on Justin's face.

"You've just found a job man!" he smiled, "and a place to stay!"


	10. no hard feelings 1

**part 10 – "no hard feelings"**

"NO WAY!" Claire shouted making her way inside the house, Justin followed her.

"Mum, why not?"

"Because Justin, you cant bring him here just like this. You dont know him! I dont want him around!" Her eyes were full of anger and determination... and confusion! And that was a kind of thing that you could only see in Claire Mcleod's eyes.

"Mum, this is our last chance!" Justin insisted wiping his sweat from his forehead.

"No!" Claire shot back.

"Mum!"

"No!"

"MUM!"

"NO!"

"Claire!" Becky called, leaning against the door frame.

"What!" Claire turned around to see her.

"Give him a chance!"

"Why?" she asked angrily, throwing her arms up in disdain.

"Because he is Alex," Becky smiled, pretending not to see Claire's unconcerned attitude "and he's back!"

Then she simply made her way out leaving the mother and son to make their decision. Justin stood there silently for a while staring at her mother's back, and turned around to go back to the stables.

"Alright!" Claire finally spoke, giving in. "Alright, bring him..." she turned to face Justin "...but I dont want him under my feet. You are taking the reponsibility. Tell him not to come around the house. And remember I'm doing this because I dont have the luxury of choosing the man I want to hire."

"Thank you mum" Justin smiled, "It'll be fine.." and ran outside to go get Alex.

"It'd better!" Claire sighed...

flashback

"_Thank you for understanding, Dean." Claire smiled, taking a step back, her hand slipping from his._

"_I want you to be happy Claire. I'll always be here, waiting.."_

"_Dean!"_

"_I mean.. If you change your mind!" he stuttered._

"_I wont.." she smiled again, walked to her horse and untying it, she climbed on and headed down to Killarney._

_When she arrived she got off the horse and walked to the house to find Alex loading his things into his ute. He cast a furtive glance at her and kept doing what he was doing. She hesitantly took a few more steps towards him, then stopped._

"_What are you doing?" she asked not so sure if she wanted to hear the answer._

"_What do I look like doing?" he asked back looking down at the ground, still loading his bags._

"_You look like leaving, but where to?"_

"_I'm moving Claire!" he said finally looking at her._

"_What!" her eyes widened._

"_You heard what I said. I'm moving in with... with..." He had to say something. He wanted to hurt Claire. So maybe he would feel better. He searched his mind for a name... any name._

"_With Lucia Alessi, remember?"_

_His question was replied with empty eyes and bitter silence, she simply nodded her head and looked away to stop the tears._

_Hurting Claire didnt make him feel better. He repented what he said but it was too late. He had to go and leave her to live her own life with Dean and be happy, as she deserved to be._

"_So how's Dean?" he needed to change the subject._

"_He's fine..." she forced a fake smile and looked down, "He.. ah.. went to his house to bring some of his belongings..."_

"_Seems like he's going to stay for awhile?" he tried to smile but coudlnt._

"_Yeah... Wont you tell me where you're going?" she asked._

_He didnt know where he was going either. He couldnt tell het that._

"_Umm.. It's better you don't know, Claire. And one more thing, please don't tell anyone that you saw me, okay?"_

"_But why!"_

"_Claire, please. Promise me!" he held her from her shoulders._

"_You sound like you're never coming back, Alex!"_

"_I will come back, Claire. Just dont know when.." he said._

"_I dont understand. But I wont ask anymore. You would leave without seeing me if I didnt come. Alright, I wont tell anyone. But if you come back, dont expect me to welcome you Alex!" she said fighting back the tears that filled her eyes. She looked at him one more time and took off._

_end of flashback_

Claire was waken from her reverie as Tess entered the room shocked.

"Tell me I'm seeing things Claire, is that Alex.. outside?"

"Yes he is, Tess. But dont ask anymore alright!" Claire replied and walked to the kitchen door.

"Claire!" Tess called chasing Claire.

"No I havent talked to him Tess if it's what you wanted to know. But I probably will have to because I've just hired him. When I talk to him, I will let you know. Any questions!" Claire shot a glance at Tess.

"Umm yes!" Tess replied hesitantly.

"TESS!"

"Oh okay.." she smiled trying to ease the tension, "..where is Carrie?"

"She's in her room.." Claire replied and raced outside.

Looking around she saw Justin with Alex and his son talking. She was about to make her way to the otherside but she saw Alex looking at her. Then he started running suddenly. Claire was confused. Alex was running to her. But before long she noticed Alex was looking at somewhere else, somewhere behind Claire. So she turned around to see what he was looking at. And she saw the smoke. Fire..! Killarney..!


	11. no hard feelings 2

Part 11 – "no hard feelings .2" 

**Alex's P.O.V.**

Walking to the car, Alex still wasnt sure if he was doing the right thing for the right reason. He was broke and needed a job so desperately. And apparently Claire needed help too. He wondered whether he was going there for himself or for her.

"For both of us" he murmured.

"What?" Justin asked.

"He's talking to himself" Shane explained, "He does it frequently throughout the week."

"Oh!" Justin raised his eyebrow. The boys shared a laugh.

"Yeah yeah..." Alex grumbled, "Get in the car.."

During the drive the boys kept laughing and making fun. They seemed to get along well. When they arrived the gate of Drovers, Justin asked Alex to pull over.

"What's wrong?" Alex asked.

"Well, I want you to wait here, I will go talk to mum." Justin said.

"She doesnt know!" Alex wasnt expecting this, "But I thought..."

"Please dont go anywhere, ok?" Justin asked, "Please?"

"Alright, go talk to her. And Shane and I will take a walk around." Alex replied.

Justin obeyed and set to walk to the house.

"Lets leave the car here, buddy." Alex offered, touching Shane's shoulder to lead him out of the car.

"Dont call me buddy!" he complained.

"Alright buddy!" Alex smiled.

"Dad!" Shane was serious.

"Okay okay..." Alex smiled at his son, walking beside him.

The weather was partly cloudy and they could feel a little sunshine. The leaves on the trees were green. Shane seemed to like the view, he was looking around fascinated.

"Look, Amy's coming!" he pointed out the distant figure of the girl on a horse. She wasnt alone. Amy and the girl near her came closer as they noticed Alex and Shane.

"Hi!" Amy spoke cheerfully.

"Hi Amy.." Alex smiled.

Little girl looked at him little awkwardly.

"So you are my uncle..?" she asked.

"Yes.. And that makes Shane your cousin.." Alex replied.

"Carrie is my cousin too" Amy smiled, pointing Carrie who was standing near her.

"Nice to meet you Carrie" Alex said, pordding Shane to respond.

"Nice to meet you" Shane spoke barely.

"We're riding to Killarney, Shane do you wanna come?" Amy asked.

"Killarney? What are you going to do there?" Alex asked.

"We go there to play _families_. Our parents know that we go there sometimes, dont worry.." little girl explained so cleverly.

"Alright then" Alex said, "but be careful!" Then he turned to Shane "Do you wanna go?"

The boy shake his head shyly, and whatched the girls ride off.

Alex and Shane walked around for awhile and decided to go back near the car. Reaching there they found Justin waiting for them.

"What happened?" Alex asked.

"Come with me," Justin smiled, "I'll show you your quarter"

"She said yes?" Alex found it hard to believe.

"Yeah.." Justing relied, walking in front of them. Then he stopped to show Alex and Shane around.

"We have stables over there" he pointed and kept talking. But Alex couldnt hear the rest, he was looking at Claire who had just walk out of the house and seemed so indecisively. But then he notice the smoke that was coming from the rear side of the hill. He started running without thinking. What was he running to? What was he going to do? Claire... Amy.. Carrie.. Fire! Killarney...


	12. cold as fire

**Part 12 – Cold as Fire**

"Oh god! Someone call Nick!" Claire yelled, turning white, her wide eyes filling with fear.

She turned rapidly on her heels to leave but she only ran into Alex who was standing right behind her. She hadn't noticed he was so close. Awkwardly she turned away. Soon a pair of strong hands on her shoulders turned her around. His breath on her face made her shiver.

"We can't wait for Nick. We have to go there!" he spoke softly, leaning in to look at her to make sure she was listening.

"Okay" she tried to find her voice but it came out as a weak whisper.

"Okay" he nodded, taking her by her arm and rushing her to the ute.

"Wait!" she stopped and turned back to face Tess who was worriedly following them. "Stay with the girls!" she ordered.

"What girls?" Tess asked confused.

"TESS! Our girls! Carrie and Amy!" Claire yelled.

"Claire, I don't know where they are!" Tess confessed, watching her sister's expression change from sincere concern to sincere bafflement.

"Uh… I do!" Alex exhaled causing them to stop argueing and look up at him with puzzled faces.

--

"Carrie!" Justin yelled, making his way to the stables.

The house was undamaged but the stables were in a big fire and seemingly there was nothing to stop the flames.

"Carrie! Amy!" he yelled again.

"Justin, stay where you are!" Alex hollered, approaching the flames, a fire extinguisher in his hands.

They had rushed over to Killarney only to find two horses tied to a tree in front of the stables. The girls weren't in the house and yet anywhere else to be seen. Claire and Tess ran to the stables behind Alex but Tess stopped before getting any closer to the smoke as she saw the growing flames. Claire paused for a second and looked at Tess, her eyes full of teror and yet tears. Tess shook her head no but Claire continued walking rapidly in the gate of the stables. It was that moment when Alex put his arm before her chest and made her stop.

"Wait here!" he stated.

It felt like an order to Claire which she was about to obey mechanically when she suddenly realized who he was. She pulled herself together and began shouting at him.

"Don't you dare tell me what to do, Alex Ryan!" she screamed, her eyes flaming with rage, "DON'T!"

"SHUT UP!" he shouted, his arm still before her chest.

"GET OUT OF MY WAY!"

"JUST WAIT HERE!"

"NO!" she screamed again, her eyes, if possible, got wider.

That was when he grabbed her by her shoulders and tried force her out of the stables.

"Let go of me!" she yelled as she quickly turned around and released herself from his grasp. And she punched him on the face.

Alex fell backwards. A thin line of blood started coming out from his nose as he stared up at her totally in shock.

--

"Mum!" the little girl called in a shaky tone as she and her terrified cousin slowly walked from back of the stables making themselves visible.

"Oh god, Amy!" Tess cried, running to her daughter and picking her up.

"Are you guys alright?" she asked.

"We're alright" Amy repiled.

"Amy.." Tess crouched down and take one of Amy's hands in hers, and put her other hand on Carrie's shoulder, "…Carrie, don't ever go anywhere without telling one of us, ever! Do you understand me?"

The little girls simply nodded their heads.

They all turned their heads to the sound of fire engine.

"Nick!" Tess called, "Claire and Alex are inside!"

--

"We have to get out of here!" Alex groaned. He put a hand on his knee to help himself up, "this place is going to fall like a house of cards!"

"I'm not going anywhere without my daughter and my niece!" Claire shot back.

"Claire they are not here!"

"How do you know that, huh?" she yelled again and started making her way further in.

"Claire just stop!" he grabbed her wrist.

"Let go of my arm, Alex!" she turned and shot him a sharp glance over her shoulder.

He simply refused letting her go.

"You have no right to be here Alex!" she said, her voice sounded different –colder somehow.

"Claire…"

"You have to right to ruin my life –our lifes again!" she turned around to face him when he finally let go of her arm. Her eyes were red.

_Is she crying? _He thought to himself. _Or is it the smoke?._

"Claire, I know what you must be thinking…"

"If you knew what I'm thinking, you wouldn't be here!"

They were startled by the sound of a sudden crash of metal against metal.

"Come on, we have to go!" he grabbed her arm again to head outside but was surprised when she puched him again instead.

"What the hell is your problem?" he whined, his eyes grew wider in shock.

"Get away from me!"

"FINE!" he shouted, "Do you wanna go inside? ALRIGHT GO! Burning to death over nothing is not in my plan!"

With that he furiusly made his way out, praying to god that his outburst would work and she would follow him outside.

"I HATE YOU!" Claire yelled watching him walk away.

"Are you two nuts?" they heard a familiar voice.

"Get out of here, the girls are safe!" Nick assured them by the time firemen got in.

--

"You could have died in there!" Tess said, throwing her arms around Claire's neck, "are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine!" Claire told her simply.

She wanted to head back to her ute when she noticed a figure making his way towards her.

"Leave me alone" she demanded, exhausted.

"Claire, hear me out!"

"I don't have to hear you out Alex Ryan, or whoever you are anymore! I don't wanna hear anything about you. I'm tired of you. Just stay away from me!"

"Claire!"

"You are just a worker for me anymore. I don't know you. And I don't want to know you!" she talked her eyes filling with tears.

"Fine.." he whispered as he backed and got out of her way.

"Carrie Stephen!" Claire called her daughter, "You are so in tourble young lady!"


End file.
